Toronto the Good, the Bad, and the Ugly

Oy Toronto.

So, my Albertan father-in-law loves to gripe about Toronto. Whether or not his complaints are legitimate or relate to the fact that his son no longer calls Alberta home is up for debate. The point however, is that for the past several years I’ve found myself in the position of having to defend the city that I call home.

And usually this is not too difficult a task. Toronto is a multicultural mecca; from food to entertainment, there’s very little you can’t find here. And for a city its size, it’s pretty clean, safe and affordable.

Unfortunately however, Toronto is headed for disaster. It seems that the city has $100 million dollar budget shortfall, and the Mayor’s proposed solution – an increase in property and vehicle registration taxes – was defeated yesterday at city council. So now the city has to find $100 million dollars in savings elsewhere, i.e. in massive cuts to public services. Plans to shut down the Sheppard subway line (which Mel shelled out a billion to build...”nobody” else would be that stupid…), a $30 million cut in police, fire and ambulance services; cuts to libraries, community and recreation centres; cancellation of proposed climate change plans, Nathan Phillips Square and city hall renovations, and a hiring freeze.

Bottom line – because of council’s desire not to tax the citizens, the citizens are going to lose all the amenities that any self-respecting city should offer. Colossally stupid, in my humble opinion. So it won’t cost any more to register my car or sell my house, but the roads I drive on will be crappy, and my neighbourhood services will be non-existent (which will probably lower my property value…)

It’s quite well-known that most Canadians dislike Torontonians at least a little bit. Perhaps it’s because we like to delude ourselves into believing we live in the best city in the world. Once the service cuts are implemented and we Torontonians become aware of how shitty this city actually is, will that mean that other Canadians will like us more? If so, maybe my father-in-law the Albertan will visit more often.

Pondering pot and patrol fleets

I think it’s fair to say that Canada isn’t one of the world’s winningest countries. With a couple of exceptions (hockey and Olympic fourth-place showings) we tend to suck when it comes to international competitions. However, it now appears that Canadians have a new record to be proud of. According to a report in today’s Globe and Mail, Canadians use marijuana 4 times more than any other developed country, with 16.8 per cent of 15-64 year-olds having smoked in 2006. The world average for that same stat is 3.8 per cent.

Now, I don’t actually smoke pot myself – I think I hit my lifetime quota sometime in university, or at least that's what severe paranoia led me to believe – but it seems to me that the smartest thing that Canada could do would be to profit off our nation’s predilection for puffing. If marijuana was legalized, it could then be regulated (and taxed) like other intoxicating/toxic substances – alcohol and tobacco to be specific. That butts and booze are potentially more dangerous than pot is a very easy argument to make. One could even argue that maintaining pot’s illegal status is a bit like closing the barn doors after all the animals are chain-smoking alcoholics. Why not let them get high as well?

And just think of all the goodies that federal pot revenues could buy: Harper could fix health care, make university free, pay off the Taliban... and all because Canadians like to get baked.

On a related note- also in today’s Globe is a report about Harper’s plans to protect Canadian sovereignty in the Arctic by spending $3.1 billion for a patrol fleet capable of operating in metre-thick ice. Add to this an additional $4.3 billion to build and maintain the ships over their lifespan, and apparently we will be safe from the evil Danes who apparently pose some sort of threat to our nation. Move over Israeli-Palestinian conflict, there’s a new territorial dispute in town. If Canadians knew that this 7 billion-dollar venture were to be paid for with pot revenues, perhaps it wouldn’t seem like such a colossally stupid waste of money.

It's been a while

I apologize for my lengthy absence. The past six months have been a tad busy- since my last post I completed the draft of my PhD dissertation and had a baby girl. Now that the draft is in and the little miss is somewhat under control, I shall return to my regular rantings about stupid shit that makes me laugh.